Returning to work after maternity leave can bring up a whirlwind of emotions. Excitement, relief, exhaustion, and, for many of us, guilt. That familiar tug in your chest when you leave your child at childcare, or simply long for more time together.
As a mum of two, I’ve been there. I remember the first week back at work vividly, the tight knot of worry in my stomach, and constantly questioning whether I was doing the “right” thing. What I learned is that guilt is normal, but it doesn’t have to control your days.
Here are five honest tips that helped me navigate working mum guilt, part of our wider guide to returning to work after maternity leave.
What you’ll find in this post
- Why working mum guilt happens, and why it’s normal
- 5 honest, practical ways to manage it day to day
- How to make the time you do have feel meaningful
- When guilt is worth talking through with someone else
The 5 tips
Honest ways to cope with working mum guilt
Pick one to start with, you don’t need all five at once.
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Tip one
Recognise that guilt is a sign you care
The first thing I had to accept was that feeling guilty does not mean I was failing as a parent. It means I care deeply about my children and my role in their lives.
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Tip two
Make the time you have count
Quality beats quantity. When you can’t be with your child all day, make the time you do have count, a silly song in the car, a story before bed, or chatting about the day over breakfast.
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Tip three
Give yourself permission to feel joy outside of work
It’s easy to feel guilty for enjoying work or time away from your children. But allowing yourself to feel fulfilled outside of parenthood is essential.
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Tip four
Share your feelings with someone who understands
Sometimes guilt feels heavier when carried alone. Talking to someone who understands, a partner, friend, or fellow working parent, can lighten the load.
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Tip five
Be realistic about your expectations
Perfection is a myth. Trying to be everything at home and at work will only increase guilt. Plan simple meals, accept that the laundry may not always be folded, and allow yourself grace for messy mornings.
- For more everyday systems that ease the mental load, see: 5 Simple Ways Busy Parents Save Time Every Day
Guilt is a sign of love, not failure.
Working mum guilt is a natural part of returning to work, but it doesn’t have to dominate your life. With intention and self-compassion, you can thrive as both a parent and a professional.
Common questions about working mum guilt
Written by a mum of two
Having navigated returning to work twice myself, I write about the honest, practical side of balancing career and family, because parents deserve real experience, not just theory.
